Dia De Los Muertos: Coping with Death and Remembering Our Grandparents - Family Love In My City

Dia De Los Muertos: Coping with Death and Remembering Our Grandparents

Sunday, November 01, 2015

Dia De Los Muertos: Coping with Death and Remembering Our Grandparents

As I set out our annual altar for Dia De Los Muertos, I could see the warmth in my son's smile as he picked up a picture of his Abuelita and him playing foosball at Chuck-E-Cheese. It is a fun memory and I am happy that by intentionally mixing our Mexican culture in our lives, we feel comfort with death and more rooted as to who we are.

Below is our first experience with death as a family, first published on mysanantonio.com.


This January, my family has experienced it’s first death of a loved one. My spouse’s grandmother passed away at the age of 89. Although with age, it is to be expected, it is nothing short of difficult. There is difficulty in experiencing the mix of emotions: sadness, feeling content that she is no longer in pain, guilt of time not spent, and joy when thinking of her fulfilled life and a reunion with her husband.

Along with this, is the issue of explaining death to our children. Our twins are almost 6 years old, and because their great-grandmother, whom we call Abuelita, was such a fixture at every birthday, holiday, t-ball game and monthly bingo night, it is only right that we explain to them what has happened and respect their feelings and thoughts.

More so than ever, I am reminded of my maternal grandparents that have passed and the strong bond that my children hold with their grandparents now. To think about the amount of love that families hold is overwhelming to the heart.

A family begins with parents, but someone had to have those parents, and so on and so on. Without my husband’s grandmother, to have my mother-in-law, to have my husband (who lived in the same household as his grandmother for 13 years) I would not have the wonderful man that I have in my life today. We would not have the same beautiful children and family that we do at this moment and I am forever thankful to her.

Families begin with grandparents. Not many of us are lucky enough to have memories with our great-grandmother. I am glad that our babies will have these memories and we will cherish and preserve these memories of our children and their Abuelita. And as we celebrated our first Dia De Los Muertos last year, we will continue to celebrate the lives of our loved ones passed and be grateful for the lives they have given to us.

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